


fear of falling (for you)

by orphan_account



Category: VIXX
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-02
Updated: 2015-08-02
Packaged: 2018-04-12 15:54:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4485681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>it’s been a long time since taekwoon has gotten close to someone, and he even if he wants to, he doesn’t know exactly how to. cue han sanghyuk, who taekwoon has to admit, is kind of adorable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	fear of falling (for you)

**Author's Note:**

> originally posted [here](http://forvixx.livejournal.com/7410.html) for the [forvixx](http://forvixx.livejournal.com/) challenge.

It happens when he’s ten. ****

Jung Taekwoon is playing soccer with a group of kids from the neighborhood, laughing and cheering in victory as he scores his second goal. His teammates hustle over to him, giving him slaps on the back and ruffling his hair. Taekwoon feels a surge of joy and pride run inside of him when they even go as far as calling him their ace and the best ten-year-old soccer player around. He knows it’s probably not true, but the compliments make him feel on top of the world and make him believe that it’s true, even if it’s just for a moment.

He’s riding the height of his happiness when it suddenly changes.

On defense, he gets a little too aggressive trying to snag the ball away from the opponent and knocks over himself with another player, sending them both spiraling into the grass. He hits the ground hard, landing on top of his friend with a loud thud.

His teammates gather around the scene as Taekwoon picks himself back up with a grunt, brushing the grass stains off of his new white shorts before extending his hand out to help the other player up. His friend murmurs a thank you as he accepts it gratefully, pulling himself to his feet.

A split second later, the kid looks up at him with a confused expression. Soccer is all about being rough, so the boy shouldn’t be too irked, Taekwoon thinks as he examines the other for any sign of injury, but he did run into him quite forcibly. He stares back, mirroring the other’s face before the other boy asks, “Who are you?”

Another kid behind him laughs, “You idiot. It’s Taekwoon. He lives a half a block away from you.”

While the others around him laugh, the kid he knocked over observes him with wide eyes. “Oh, well, it’s nice to meet you Taekwoon.”

Taekwoon nods silently in response, walking away while trying to wrap his head around the turn of events. But he doesn’t let the event deter him and plays on diligently and passionately until another kid asks for his name after his hand accidentally brushes the other’s calf. And then another stares at him blankly when his forearm grazes the player’s thigh.

The match doesn’t even officially end. It ends when all of the other children around his age wander off asking wondering who he is, leaving him alone in the middle of the field with only his soccer ball.

 

 

He can’t touch other people’s skin, Taekwoon eventually discovers.

Well, he can, he supposes, but it results in the person he touched forgetting who he is, or essentially erasing every memory they have ever had of him.

The only people who truly know about this unique ability are his mother and father, but they too have forgotten who he is on numerous occasions. The first incident caused Taekwoon to cry and run away from home for a day, lurking over to a friend’s house that actually still remembered him. He waited for his mother and father to search for him. No one came. Instead, he sauntered home with the backpack he brought with him, knocking politely on the door to his own home and trying to explain that he is actually their child. Now to save himself the trouble of long and agonizing explanations, Taekwoon has a book compiled of all of his basic information so any time he makes a slip-up, like when his mother pats him affectionately on the cheek, he can simply hand them the book. He has gone through this a total of eighteen times.

When Taekwoon first connected the pieces to the puzzle, it didn’t seem as bad as the reality actually was. He only needed to avoid any signs or threats of physical contact. But it proved to be a more difficult task, with his teachers forgetting he was even a part of their class. There was also a severe loss of his friends, most of them assuming that he was a new student rather than a friend they had known for six years.

Luckily, for his eleventh birthday, his mother invested in eleven pairs of gloves and tall socks. As long as his skin wasn’t touching with another person’s, Taekwoon was fine. He could bump into people’s shoulders and not cause an issue. He earned weird glances and comments, but he would prefer to deal with rude remarks than more people losing knowledge of him.

This thing, whatever it was, took away his one true love though: soccer.

It was the one thing Taekwoon could rely on in his hardest moments and opened a door to making friends, but as soon as all the players would slowly lose their memories of him, he couldn’t play any more. So instead, he focused on his studies and managed to pull off some of the highest marks out of anyone in his grade. In between his studying he found a newfound passion in music. It was something that didn’t require the company of others. Just him and a piano. That’s all he needs anyway.

Friendships are complicated and relationships are even worse. It’s easier for him to stay silent and keep his distance, no matter if people whisper about him. He eventually learns it leave it alone because in the end it’s better for everyone.

He makes it out of high school unscathed, no one testing his limits, but comes college and his first crisis arrives. And its name is Han Sanghyuk.

 

 

It’s January 13th and approximately 7:40 a.m. on a Monday morning and Taekwoon really isn’t thrilled by this particular setup. Intro Sociology was not supposed to be part of his music major schedule this far into his college life, but that one extra elective he needed screwed him over and now he’s stuck in a class full of freshmen. Or he at least assumes to be freshmen by how rambunctious the few people occupying the back are acting.

He sits in the giant lecture hall, sitting close enough to the front so he can make an escape if necessary but not too close that he looks completely enthralled by this course. It’s an eight a.m. class. No one should be pleased about this predicament at all.

Luckily, most of the students wander towards the back as it slowly approaches eight. The seats are either side of him are still vacant and Taekwoon plans to keep it that way by throwing his backpack into the chair on his left, indirectly forbidding anyone to sit there.

Taekwoon pulls out his supplies, half-heartedly flipping open his notebook to a fresh, blank page. He looks down at his hands, debating whether to take off his gloves so he can take notes, but decides against it and keeps them on because of the chilly weather.

He enjoys winter weather the most because people don’t give him strange glances when he is fully clothed from head to toe. When he decides to go out somewhere during the summer, even on the hottest of days, he usually wears long sleeved shirts and jeans with his gloves just in case. He never knows what might happen, even with strangers.

Sighing, he shrugs off his scarf and sets it on top of his belongings, patiently waiting for the lecture to begin. There are only two minutes until the class officially starts and suddenly a mass of students flood into the room and hike up the stairs, looking for open seats. There are plenty of them, Taekwoon notes, so he’s not really worried about anyone marking the chair next to him.

The professor floats in as soon as it hits eight and the room becomes silent as the professor drones on about the expectations that come with the course. Taekwoon sighs; he knew he should have skipped this class.

His eyes start to droop about five minutes into the monotone talk. Catching a few extra minutes of shuteye couldn’t hurt Taekwoon contemplates as he rests his chin on top of his palm.

The sound of a chair being pulled out jerks him awake and reins him fully conscious. He scoots over before he glances over out the kid sitting next to him that looks seemingly out of breath. The other male coughs and takes a moment to glance over at Taekwoon, flashing him a bright smile as he shoves aside his own book bag.

Taekwoon breaks the eye contact, focusing on the large screen in front of him and acting like he’s busy reading over the presentation. It’s not a very good act though as no one else is paying attention to it anymore either.

The kid leans over to his side, invading all the boundaries and personal space that Taekwoon keeps dear to him, and whispers, “What did I miss?” The kid smiles again even as Taekwoon flinches, his eyes nearly disappearing from how wide his mouth stretches. It’s kind of cute, Taekwoon admits.

“Not much.” Taekwoon mumbles and the other boy nods before digging through his bag once again and Taekwoon uses this chance to shift over, maintaining a distance he’s comfortable at. If he didn’t get the message before, hopefully he will now that there is a wider gap in between the two. He makes sure to pointedly ignore any advances the other attempts to make throughout the course of time, making it look like he’s writing important things down when really Taekwoon is only writing over the big ‘X’ he put on today’s date.

He snaps out of his trance when he hears others standing up, signaling that the class is over. He yawns while tossing his agenda back into his bag, snapping it up quickly and making a move to leave.

Taekwoon’s halfway out of his chair when his sleeve gets pulled on harshly. The boy sitting next to him has the decency to look a bit sheepish as he rubs at the back of his neck, but still continues on. “I’m Han Sanghyuk.” Sanghyuk offers a smile, extending his hand out.

Taekwoon stares down at the hand, his eyebrows wrinkling together before he gets up fully.

He slings his bag over his shoulder, double-checking that he has his possessions as he brushes his jeans off. Taekwoon slides on his irritated face, sending it towards Sanghyuk as a warning. The kid’s smile on his face falters, but that’s the only damage.

Taekwoon sighs. “Next time, don’t sit next to me kid.”

Before Sanghyuk earns the chance to counter, Taekwoon slips out of the row and heads down towards the exit. He doesn’t look back to see Sanghyuk’s reaction.

 

 

Taekwoon decides on Wednesday that he’ll take his time getting to lecture, opting to stroll comfortably with his earbuds in as he listens to Verbal Jint. The wind blows fitfully, causing the ends of his scarf to flap through the air. With disgruntled hands, Taekwoon grips onto the fabric, burying his face into the warmth as he pushes on towards the building.

He makes it to the building only slightly frozen, walking through the near empty hallways carefully and pushing his way inside the lecture hall. The clock on the wall tells him it’s only a couple of minutes before eight, so he strides up the stairs and makes him feel satisfied.

The professor walks in, looking just as bored as he did on Monday, and pulls up his PowerPoint, leading the other students to grab their materials. Taekwoon drearily pulls out his things, groaning to himself as he clicks his pen.

He turns to the front, but out of the corner of his eye he catches sight of that kid, Sanghyuk, sitting in his row. He didn’t see him, let alone hear him come up the steps and he recalls Monday’s events. The only difference is that Sanghyuk is not seated directly next to him, but there is a one-chair gap in between the two of them.

Taekwoon sighs. His warning wasn’t heeded.

A crumpled piece of paper wadded into a ball hits Taekwoon on the side of his head. The ball lands in his lap and Taekwoon has to pull it out from between his thighs.

He glances over at Sanghyuk, who grins happily and gestures for him to open it. He does, peeling apart the paper very carefully before he reads the note.

_I kept my promise! ^^ Because I didn’t want to make hyung (?) upset, I didn’t sit next to you. By the way hyung (I think you’re a hyung. Right?), you should tell me your name. – Sanghyuk_

Taekwoon rereads it a couple of times, then he shifts his eyes to peek at Sanghyuk who jots down notes in a studious manner. He keeps his eyes trained on him for a little long, and Sanghyuk notices, offering a cute little wave and bright smile to him. It’s instinct now to turn away from Sanghyuk every time he sends a smile his way. All it has Taekwoon thinking is that he probably needs to invest in some acting classes if he wants to be more believable.

Fifty minutes passes by quickly and the lights flick back on, giving Taekwoon an eyesore. Undoubtedly, he began to lose interest about thirty minutes through and closed his eyes while listening to the lecture. He likely did tune out some important points, but that’s what the textbook is for.

He takes his time packing today and then soon realizes that Sanghyuk is still sticking around, looking expectantly up at him for some reason. What more could he possibly want?

“You read my note right, hyung?” When Sanghyuk says the word ‘hyung,’ his pitch raises a tiny bit, revealing signs of puberty in his voice.

Taekwoon nods silently. Sanghyuk stays silent, nodding in response. Then after a brief moment of awkward air and no one moving, Sanghyuk infers, “You don’t say much do you hyung?”

He mumbles a ‘yeah,’ waiting for Sanghyuk to respond. The other opens his mouth, flipping on his cell phone for a moment before he curses and rushes to put his stuff together.

“I’m sorry!” Sanghyuk squeaks, catching the pen that rolls away and cramming it into his back pocket. “I have to get to class now!” He glances at the clock on the wall again before groaning.

On his way out, he pauses to bid Taekwoon goodbye, then he’s hustling out the door.

Taekwoon stands frozen, ignoring the other group of teenagers that invade the room. Well, that was strange.

 

 

A part time job at the movie theater isn’t so bad. Taekwoon is always put on theater-cleaning duty, picking up the trash that many moviegoers are too lazy to pick up and dump into the wastebin that is conveniently located directly outside to exit. Sometimes Taekwoon doesn’t mind picking up the garbage because it gives something to do. It’s not the nicest job, but it accommodates to his schedule well and gives him a decent pay. Plus, cleaning out movie theaters doesn’t force him into interacting with others outside of bowing politely to people as they leave.

Occasionally, he’ll see people from his classes and they wave at him out of politeness, but to be frank he rarely remembers their names and can only wave back at them as they pass by. He doesn’t consider any of them friends, some of them he doesn’t even bother to call acquaintances, just simply people he knows.

The only people he would consider his friends (but never actually say it out loud) are Hakyeon and Jaehwan, both also employees of this establishment. Jaehwan, like Taekwoon, cleans theaters with him, and they usually sit together while they wait for the movie theater to empty. It mostly consists of Jaehwan ranting about anything and everything while Taekwoon stares at the crowd of people making their way out. And even though Hakyeon is at the front counter selling tickets to customers, he always manages to weasel his way over to the two of them in the middle of his shift. No matter how many times Taekwoon rejects Hakyeon’s advances; he still attempts to drape his arm over Taekwoon’s shoulder, acting like they are friends. Even though they both try to rope Taekwoon into any form of skinship, they leave him alone after he vehemently denies them.

It’s hovering around eight p.m. when Taekwoon finishes sweeping out theater number five with Jaehwan hot on his heels. He’s rumbling on about some younger guy (Wonshik, Taekwoon believes) and how they are paired as lab partners yet neither of them have any great interest or knowledge of chemistry. Jaehwan, like he, is roped into some basic course that he regrettably put off until now.

He picks up his pace, using any measures to keep as far away as Jaehwan at this very moment, not wanting to be completely caught into Jaehwan’s monologue. In his hurry, Taekwoon promptly runs into someone and he reacts by holding onto their arm so neither of them topples over into the ugly carpet pattern this movie theater has.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t paying attention to where I w-“ A blink. “Wait, _hyung?_ ” In front of Taekwoon stands Han Sanghyuk, who is bundled up a crisp sweater with a girl, in fact, a very pretty girl, slung around his arm.

“Hi.” Taekwoon mumbles, fixing his work vest that got crumple upon impact.

“I didn’t you know you worked here.” Sanghyuk supplies, turning so he’s facing Taekwoon. This is immensely awkward, Taekwoon thinks as he breathes out. They only met approximately two days ago and he’s practically interrupting his date. He’s not one who’s been in many awkward situations, but he assumed this is what one feels like.

Taekwoon coughs, pointedly looking at everywhere that isn’t Sanghyuk. “I do.”

The conversation drops and the girl around Sanghyuk’s arm tugs him, pulling him towards the movie theater Taekwoon just finished cleaning. “Let’s go Sanghyuk. I don’t want to miss all the previews.”

Sanghyuk hums in acknowledgement, glimpsing at Taekwoon for a moment before he turns back the girl. “Sure, noona.” The younger male smiles, offering, “So I guess I’ll see you on Friday then hyung.” He doesn’t even if know if Sanghyuk sees his nod before the girl drags him along, watching silently when Sanghyuk throws a glance over his shoulder to wave goodbye.

“Who was that?” Jaehwan, who appears out of thin air, whispers a few inches from Taekwoon’s ear, startling him easily and earning a loud cackle out of Jaehwan. Making use of his surroundings, Taekwoon removes the dustpan attached to his broom and proceeds to smack Jaehwan’s ass with it, continuing until Jaehwan nearly shrivels in on himself and can’t take the pain anymore.

He stops once he notices the manager watching him from afar and observing the two of them, so he stops and strides towards theater eight to clean up the next mess with Jaehwan only a few feet behind, clutching onto his stomach as he wheezes. As soon as Jaehwan tries to bring the topic up again, Taekwoon holds up the dustpan, grinning internally when Jaehwan instantly quiets, focusing on his meticulous sweeping and cleaning up the theater in record time.

Jaehwan doesn’t need to know anyways.

 

 

Taekwoon rolls over at eight thirty a.m. on Friday morning with a stuffed up nose and a horrible cough that leaves him throat feeling dry and like it’s made of sandpaper. His head throbs as he sits up and throws his covers off, body feeling too warm. With half closed eyes, Taekwoon waddles to his bathroom and fetching the cough medicine in the cabinet.

He looks at his disheveled appearance and winces, taking in his drowsy eyes and quite evident bedhead. He’s already slept through most of Sociology and after waking up; Taekwoon has no motivation to attend his other two classes even if school just started back up.

His feet drag him back to his bed, flopping down and pulling the covers over his bottom half. He closes his eyes with his hand pressed to his forehead, massaging his skin as if it would soothe his headache.

As he lies in bed, Taekwoon wonders if Sanghyuk is sitting in the same spot, secretly wishing that he were there. Probably not, Taekwoon concludes as he moves to rest on his side so he’s facing the wall. Maybe feeling a little lonely, but probably doesn’t need him.

He sniffles, trying to fall back asleep as he wonders more about Sanghyuk.

 

 

It’s Saturday night and Taekwoon sits right outside theater four with his headphones nestled in his ears, waiting for the end of the newest _Hunger Games_ movie. Jaehwan stands next to his chair, furiously typing away on his cell phone and making small, frustrated noises every few moments.

Every couple of minutes, Jaehwan sighs loudly, trying to attract Taekwoon’s attention to him so he can go on a spiel about whatever it is that is irking him. Although Taekwoon knows this, he has no intention of letting Jaehwan occupy his free time by rambling on and on when he could instead bask in the silence in his few spare moments.

Jaehwan nudges him anyway with his elbow, insistently prodding at him until Taekwoon pulls out his earbuds and snaps, “What?”

Gently patting Taekwoon on the shoulder, Jaehwan tilts his chin, trying to gesture something with it but sadly fails. When Taekwoon only raises a brow in response, Jaehwan pouts a little but points directly across from them. “That kid is here again.”

Sure enough when Taekwoon cranes his head up, Han Sanghyuk is at the front counter, purchasing a ticket from Hakyeon who is on-duty. He stares as Sanghyuk bows a little to Hakyeon before he heads inside, closing the gap between the two of them. He’s looking around as if he’s searching for someone, even pulling out his phone to glance at the time.

“Looks like someone admires his hyung.” Jaehwan singsongs happily, resting his chin on the top of his broom as he purses his lips. And while Taekwoon wants to deny the statement, he kind of secretly hopes it is true, that Sanghyuk is here looking for him and not waiting for the same pretty girl to show up, or a different one for that matter. To his side, Jaehwan continues, “I wish I had a cute underclassmen looking for me at my job.” He scans over Taekwoon carefully. “All I get though is a coworker who I am not even twenty percent positive likes me.”

Taekwoon ignores Jaehwan in favor of watching Sanghyuk, who still fiddles around with his phone and sways back and forth impatiently. But he was just here on Wednesday, could he really have another movie date?

“What’s his name?” Jaehwan leans down to ask and earns a jab from Taekwoon’s elbow directly into his gut. Despite it hurting like hell, Jaehwan laughs it off and rests against the wall of the theater for support.

“It’s none of your business Jaehwan.” Taekwoon replies, glaring up at his coworker.

“You’re not denying that you know him.” Jaehwan points out with a grin that spreads from ear to ear. And no, Taekwoon can’t really deny it so he stays silent.

Jaehwan takes it as a victory and cheers to himself. For celebration, he makes a move to poke Taekwoon’s cheek, but he dodges by leaning out of Jaehwan’s reach. It’s easy; Jaehwan does not excel in stretching or reaching things with his arms.

“Hyung!” Sanghyuk sidles up to the two with a bright smile that reaches his eyes, watching the whole situation unfold curiously. Taekwoon shoves Jaehwan further away from him, and Jaehwan dramatically yelps and instantly claims he’s going to bruise but Taekwoon disregards his voice.

Once Taekwoon fixates his position so he’s facing Sanghyuk, the younger says, “I didn’t see you in class yesterday.”

From behind them, Jaehwan coughs, signaling to theater four behind them. “I’ll just be over,” he moves in hands in large motions, not exactly sure where’s he pointing to but just enough for a general idea, “Here, somewhere.”

Jaehwan ends up smack against the corner of the wall, facing towards the plaster and messing around with his broom. Taekwoon rolls his eyes at his antics but Sanghyuk laughs, seemingly finding it more amusing rather than creepy. “Your friend?” Sanghyuk asks, hiding his smile behind a closed fist as he still trains his eyes on Jaehwan for a few more moments.

Taekwoon clucks his tongue, not exactly sure how define his relationship with Jaehwan. So he simply says, “Kind of.”

Sanghyuk nods in understanding, observing his surroundings before his eyes land on Taekwoon. Taekwoon should really be trying to hold a conversation because Sanghyuk acts like he’s waiting for him to say something, but his lack of social skills render him speechless.

Apparently, Sanghyuk senses all the awkwardness oozing out from Taekwoon and resumes, “Do you always work here on Saturdays?”

Taekwoon hums. “Yeah.”

“What time does your shift end?”

Sanghyuk presumably blushes a little and Taekwoon has no idea where that came from. But it’s kind of ridiculously adorable that Taekwoon instantly replies, “Nine.”

The clock on the wall indicates it’s only a quarter past eight. Taekwoon has already been here since three and he can’t wait for the exact moment he steps out of those theater’s front doors. There’s only so much stepped-on popcorn and soda cups you can be willing to clean in one day, and Taekwoon has had his share of it already.

“Would you like to, you know,” Sanghyuk bites on his lower lip, unsure, “Catch a movie with me after your shift?”

Taekwoon’s heart does this little thud that he didn’t know was possible when Sanghyuk shyly looks up at him, expecting an answer. Even though he wants to, he says, “No, not really.”

Sanghyuk’s face drops like he’s disappointed with that answer and Taekwoon quickly adds, “I don’t really want to spend another minute in here after my shift ends. We can go get something to eat though?”

As the beginning of a steady stream begins to filter out of theater four, Sanghyuk agrees with a wide grin. He motions towards the benches near the entrance and informs Taekwoon of that’s where he’ll be waiting before he scurries off in that direction, leaving a rush of air and Taekwoon smiling a little on the outside and grinning on the inside.

Once the theater clears out, he pushes past Jaehwan before he even finds the chance to start piling on questions like he’s known to do.

From behind him, Taekwoon swear he hears Jaehwan bellowing across the entire movie theater, “Hakyeon hyung, you won’t believe this! Taekwoon hyung has _game_.”

 

 

Sanghyuk is very cute, Taekwoon notes in his head.

The way he stares intensely at the pizza menu in front of him, contemplating over all the choices is really cute, you know, in a not creepy sort of way. He runs his finger over the choices, pointing at one for a long while before he shakes his head and switches over to another option.

Even when Taekwoon left the theater, he was being cute. When his shift ended, he hovered around the front benches to find Sanghyuk. He was very much confused when there was a severe lack of Sanghyuk at the benches. But over the crowd of elementary students, he sees Sanghyuk engaged in a shooting with another child that probably is in middle school based on how much acne he has. Sanghyuk is spitting out declarations of war loud enough Taekwoon can hear from a good few meters away.

As soon as the younger saw him, he ended up apologizing to the kid and hustling over to meet Taekwoon. He look embarrassed but Taekwoon gave him a reassuring smile and drove them to a near-by pizza joint. Sanghyuk just has the bit of innocence to him that reminds Taekwoon of the kids he sees at the playground occasionally and it’s really, _really_ cute.

And now Taekwoon is beginning to feel overwhelmed by his natural cuteness.

“Hyung,” Sanghyuk leans across the booth they’re sitting in, pointing out something on the menu, but Taekwoon is too locked in on Sanghyuk to even know what exactly he’s supposed to be looking at. “Should I get the cheeseburger pizza or the Thai pizza?” He wiggles in his seat excitedly. “There’s so many good options, it’s hard to decide.”

Grabbing a hold of Sanghyuk’s menu, he points at the top of it where there is information on the sizes, indicating the slices. “Get one of each.” Sanghyuk murmurs appreciatively, nodding in confirmation before he folds away the menu. The petite waitress comes over and takes their order, subtly eyeing Sanghyuk like he’s an item on the menu while he orders. He’s too naïve and oblivious to notice but Taekwoon dutifully takes over and glares at her through his lashes. When she meets his eyes, she’s shocked and nearly runs away after completing their order. Sanghyuk seems confused, about to ask what happened but Taekwoon sends him a shrug, feigning innocence.

“Hyung, I have a question.” Taekwoon reaches for his glass of water, sipping on it through the straw. “Are you cold?”

It doesn’t take a genius to figure out Sanghyuk is indirectly asking about his gloves. It’s understandable though; his gloves are quite out of place despite the cold weather since everyone else practically peels away every extra layer of clothing once they reach indoors. He’s lied to a few people about why he wears gloves before, and most of the time it involves having sensitive skin or always being cold, but this time the question catches him off guard and Taekwoon doesn’t quite know what to say.

“Those ones look dirty.” Sanghyuk says, reaching out to take Taekwoon’s hands. Taekwoon gulps as Sanghyuk holds his hands up, pulling them closer to his face so he can inspect all the wear-and-tears they have, clucking his tongue as he finds a miniscule hole in between his thumb and index finger. “You should take better care of these.”

Taekwoon murmurs, “I will,” and Sanghyuk beams up at him, asking him plenty of more questions that has Taekwoon flustered and giving unsure responses because sometimes Sanghyuk spits out a question so fast that Taekwoon isn’t even sure he heard it correctly.

Once the waitress from earlier brings out their food, Sanghyuk falls silent, strictly worrying about inhaling his food and chewing it so he can savor every single bite. Taekwoon, in contrast, nibbles on his food and peels off the black olives off of his slice of pizza. Sanghyuk catches this quirk, asking in disbelief with a piece of crust in his mouth, “You don’t like black olives?” Taekwoon shakes his head, pushing it over towards Sanghyuk who eagerly picks them up off the plate and sprinkles the condiment on top of his own slices.

He only finishes one and a half of his slices, plopping the other half that is still untouched onto Sanghyuk’s side and insisting that he eat it. He didn’t think someone could smile so wide over a piece of pizza, but here Sanghyuk is again, disproving every assumption that Taekwoon has ever created as he happily eats that one as well.

Sanghyuk finally finishes his food, wiping the grease on his upper lip off with his already used napkin and smiles out of content. “This was fun. We should do it again sometime.” He looks down at his empty plate, his smile suddenly becoming shy. “Hyung, you should give me your phone number this time though so I don’t have to bother Hakyeon hyung about your schedule.”

Taekwoon scowls. He should of known Hakyeon was the one who told Sanghyuk. And even though he scowls, Sanghyuk laughs gingerly, and Taekwoon thinks maybe this is the one time he should be thanking Hakyeon.

 

 

After exchanging phone numbers, Taekwoon discovers Sanghyuk likes to text. A lot.

He’ll send good morning texts with some cute emoticon that makes Taekwoon confused because he’s not exactly sure if Sanghyuk wants a response. So he decides to occasionally reply to them, only on the days that don’t share Sociology together. And when he replies, Sanghyuk always sends another emoticon that makes Taekwoon chuckle.

He finds himself fixated to his phone more than usual if it’s any indication by the way Jaehwan peeks over his shoulder, trying to stealthily read his messages over his shoulder. This happens in class too, where he finds himself distracted by the device and letting all the information spit out at him go through one ear and out the other.

The phone now serves as means of diversion, but it also possesses some benefits, such as Sanghyuk texting him after his shift with a message saying he’s outside the theater. His attempts not to look too happy end in failure, as Hakyeon watches him with narrowed eyes from the front counter until their manager throws him a nasty look that instantly has Hakyeon back on his feet and focused on the customers.

The last few times they’ve met up, Taekwoon let Sanghyuk choose where they should go eat and offers to pay every time. Sanghyuk is persistent and slips some money into the pockets of Taekwoon’s jeans when he isn’t paying attention and no matter how many times Taekwoon holds the money out to return it, Sanghyuk refuses by running away.

This time is no different, huddled together in the booth of some new Chinese restaurant that Sanghyuk really wanted to try and Taekwoon agreed even without Sanghyuk pulling him along by the sleeve of his jacket.

Sanghyuk is slurping on his Lo Mein noodles when he stops, shouting out an ‘ah’ that startles Taekwoon into dropping one of his chopsticks and indirectly a piece of his cashew chicken as well. He digs through the jacket next to him, frantically searching for something. Taekwoon wonders what it is until Sanghyuk finds it, setting it on the table in front of them. What is in front of him makes Taekwoon’s heart leap in his chest.

It’s a pair of grey gloves.

“Last time you wore those ones with the holes in them I thought I should get you a new pair.” He eyes the pair covering Taekwoon’s hands. “Or at least a pair that isn’t black.” He grins like a child, passing the gloves over to Taekwoon.

“I,” Taekwoon says, examining the gloves in his hands. They are right amount of softness and the right amount of warmness. How did Sanghyuk know? With a gentle smile, he finishes, “Thank you.”

So zeroed in on the gloves, he fails to catch the tinge of light pink that brushes over Sanghyuk’s cheeks. When he smiles up at Sanghyuk, the color is already skillfully hidden away and in its place is a matching, genuine smile. And when Sanghyuk leans forward and touches Taekwoon’s hand, he doesn’t flinch. He’s hesitant, only letting him hold onto his index finger, but Sanghyuk accepts it readily.

They work through the rest of their meal with Sanghyuk still lightly holding onto the tips of his finger and although it’s something small, it’s a start.

 

 

A week later and Taekwoon’s stress hits an all-time high as he juggles two papers due within a day of each other and long, inconvenient hours at work. He’s supposed to be working on a piece for his music composition course, but that’s pushed behind because of the other load of work that is at the top of his priorities. And even though he should probably be in his dorm room, cramming and typing away his papers, he’s outside, a block away from his dorm, kicking a soccer ball.

It rained recently, so the bottom of his shoes are getting soaked, but Taekwoon doesn’t really mind right now, only concentrating on hitting the soccer ball against the wall. Somehow, the sound of the ball bouncing against the bricks soothes Taekwoon, makes him feel comfortable.

He dribbles the ball with his feet, running around and sweating up a storm when he hears a small voice from behind him. “Hyung?”

Like fate, Sanghyuk stands there with two bags of groceries overflowing with junk food in his hands. He looks almost as greasy as Taekwoon feels, with these horrendous Hawaiian patterned shorts on and socks with sandals. Taekwoon’s mouth flips up a little, “Hungry?”

Sanghyuk scans over his groceries, and as if it was on queue, his stomach rumbles, causing him to blush before he answers, “Yeah. Exams are kind of a pain.”

Taekwoon nods, kicking up the soccer ball and catching it in his hands. He gently wipes off the pieces of grass attached to it. “I know the feeling.”

When he looks back up, Sanghyuk is staring at the soccer ball in his hands, as if he’s contemplating something. Then, quite suddenly, he offers, “Do you want to come back to my dorm?” He holds up his bags, jiggling them around for emphasis. “My roommate ditched me this weekend and to be honest, I would like some company. I also bought the jumbo pack of chocolate-covered pretzels and I think I probably need someone to supervise me and to tell me when to stop eating.”

The way Sanghyuk looks sheepish makes Taekwoon laugh, something he finds himself doing a lot of now. He walks over to Sanghyuk and takes one of his bags from his arm. “Lead the way.”

 

 

Sanghyuk _really_ didn’t buy anything remotely healthy. He stacked up on cookies, chips, and ramen and Taekwoon doesn’t think he’s ever wanted carrots so badly in his lifetime. But Sanghyuk scoops another spoonful of chocolate chip ice cream, holding it out for Taekwoon, but he declines because his stomach is starting to feel bloated just by looking at the wide spread of food.

“Did you know, hyung,” Sanghyuk says around his spoon, melted ice cream trickling down his chin that Taekwoon has to wipe up with a napkin. “I think you look the happiest while playing soccer.”

Taekwoon gulps down some water. “How would you know?”

“Sociology wasn’t the first time I saw you.” Sanghyuk reaches over for the pretzels, placing the bag in his lap as he sits cross-legged on the sofa. “The first time I actually saw you was at that spot I found you at today. You were playing soccer then too. But I was just walking by when I saw you.” Shoving another pretzel into his mouth, he smiles, “I kind of watched from around the corner for a while because you were really cool. So when I saw you in Sociology, I thought I should sit next to you, but that didn’t go exactly as I planned.”

Taekwoon steals the pretzel that Sanghyuk is about to put into his mouth, earning a pout from the younger as he chews on it thoughtfully. “You had something planned?” Taekwoon teases, snatching the bag of pretzels away from Sanghyuk entirely. Sanghyuk squeaks in annoyance, seeming to forget he did say he needed someone to manage his food intake.

“I’m not going to tell you now,” Sanghyuk whines and grabs the package of cookies this time, ripping off the top unevenly. “You’re making fun of me. And you stole my pretzels.”

Taekwoon protests by again attempting to take away all the snacks that Sanghyuk continuously eats. Only when he leans back, Sanghyuk moves away as far as the couch will allow him, trying to inhale the last of the cookies before Taekwoon gets his hands on them. Sanghyuk gets stuck wedged next to the arm of the sofa, only giving him the ability to move his upper portion. Taekwoon forgets and his face almost collides into the exposed skin of Sanghyuk’s neck, but luckily he pulls himself back to an upright position before he makes contact, adjusting to be as far as away from Sanghyuk as possible.

He purposefully avoids Sanghyuk’s looks to not make things weird, but the atmosphere has already shifted and he doesn’t know what to say. Then, Sanghyuk mumbles, crushed, “Do you really not like touching me that much?”

“That’s not it,” he insists, figuring out how to word what he needs to say without it sounding completely ridiculous. If someone else told him that when someone touches their skin their memories disappear he wouldn’t believe it either. Instead, he holds up his hand, extending it out in front of Sanghyuk. “I wear these gloves for a reason.”

Sanghyuk scoffs around a cookie. “Because you’re always cold right?”

“Not really.” Taekwoon replies. The urge to bite at his nails is strong right now. It happens especially when he feels uncomfortable or tense. “This is might sound crazy but-“

“Please don’t tell me you’re trying to quote Carly Rae Jepsen, hyung,” Sanghyuk interrupts, a joking smile played out on his lips. Out of habit, Taekwoon narrows his eyes at the younger in an attempt to look threatening, but Sanghyuk laughs loudly, not at all fazed by his face. “I’m kidding.” Sanghyuk sticks his tongue out for good measure, leading Taekwoon to sigh at his childish antics. “Continue.”

He sighs loudly, biting the inside of his cheek. “I can’t touch people’s skin.”

It’s dead silent, and Taekwoon is under the assumption Sanghyuk probably thinks he’s crazy. But Sanghyuk stares blankly at the wall, his mouth slightly hanging open in consideration. The good thing is that he doesn’t seem like he’s completely dumbfounded by the response and he isn’t moving to kick him out of his dorm room. This is already going better than expected.

“You aren’t joking with me, right?” Sanghyuk wonders out loud, nibbling onto his lower lip. Taekwoon shakes his head. Nodding, Sanghyuk says, “It’s weird? I guess, but it makes sense even though it shouldn’t?” A hand runs through his hair, ruffling some of the locks before he faces back towards Taekwoon. “Why?”

Taekwoon shrugs, and that seems to be a good enough answer for Sanghyuk because it’s only for a moment before he scoots closer and closer to him until there is less than a foot in between them. “It’s just skin right?” A nod. “So you won’t mind if I lay my head on your shoulder right?”

What.

It takes a moment to register completely, but Sanghyuk is already moving in and settling his head down on the very edge of his shoulder, snuggling into the fabric of Taekwoon’s shirt. Sanghyuk inhales deeply, closing his eyes and sitting comfortably despite Taekwoon’s tense position. Even though there is a barrier between Sanghyuk and his skin, he still feels anxious, as if by some chance his shirt will start to fray away and Sanghyuk will unexpectedly forget him.

Into his shirt, Taekwoon hears Sanghyuk mumbling, “You’re warm, hyung. So warm.” There’s a light smile on his lips and Taekwoon’s heart swells a little at the fact that Sanghyuk nestled against him, looking so innocent and peaceful.

Sanghyuk’s eyes flutter open, gazing up at Taekwoon through the small tunnel of vision he has. “Can I try something?” Carefully, he nudges his nose against Taekwoon’s shoulder before he slides his hand down in search for Taekwoon’s. Taekwoon’s breath hitches in his throat when Sanghyuk hesitantly laces their fingers together, resting their interlocked hands on their thighs.

The sight alone makes Taekwoon jittery in excitement and happiness, his stomach feeling full from too much sugar and some butterflies. “It’s not much,” Sanghyuk states as he flushes when Taekwoon squeezes his hand lovingly, “But it’s something.”

With a small smile of his own, Taekwoon reassures, “We’ll figure something out.”

Sanghyuk’s eyes crinkle like the usually do when he’s happiest and Taekwoon notes out of happiness that he’s the one who caused them to crinkle. It may take some time, but if it’s Sanghyuk…“Of course we will.”

They stay like that for a while, with Sanghyuk beginning to draw patterns on his glove with his fingertips, squeezing his hand every once in a while because he likes the feeling.

“Hyung?” Sanghyuk asks and Taekwoon hums to show he has his attention. “Can we go on a movie date? After all the times I visited you at the theater and I didn’t even get to see a single movie. I think you owe me.”

Taekwoon scowls, but he agrees easily to the request. And honestly, when Sanghyuk starts to trail off on a list of all the things he wants them to do together, he’ll agree to them all. Because it’s for Sanghyuk, and if it’s Sanghyuk, it’s worth a shot.

**Author's Note:**

> comments are much appreciated!


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